Why I love the song His Mistakes by Usher Raymond

Usher’s His Mistakes: for a lady acting lukewarm over the wrongs of her ex

Here is a song that speaks out for those guys who don’t have the guts to say enough is enough to the clumsiness of their newly found girlfriends. It is His Mistakes by Usher, off his 2008 Here I Stand album. 4 minutes and 59 seconds long, the song has a powerful message for that lady trying to tire you. It will advise her to stop comparing you to her ex, while at the same time echoing the element of you being loving, accommodating and caring. 

Sample the paradox in these chorus lines: “I love you, girl, but I refuse to stay / Paying for his mistakes.” The persona is willing to call it quits if his new catch continues being overprotective just because her ex inflicted upon her an unforgettable heartbreak. But he insists that he loves her and is willing to do anything to prove it. Thus he says in the chorus: “I’ll do anything to prove I love you / Baby girl but I refuse to / Pay for something I didn’t do . . .”

True, a heartbroken lady will always be riding by the ‘once bitten twice shy’ adage. But why should the guy who comes next be the one to suffer? Why should an innocent bloke who has made a catch be trapped in a catch 22 while he should be focusing on a bright future?

Any guy who has ever hooked up with a chick on a rebound will concur that the initial phases of the relationship are not the rosiest of moments. She is ever suspicious, overly cautious, negative about men in general and is, on end, not so interesting to be with.

To add insult to injury, some even begin telling you how well-behaved the ex was when he was at the same stage of the relationship as the one you are in. Such responses as, “Even him he used to take me out whenever I wanted to . . . even him he always said he would like to marry me . . .” are commonplace. Eventually you look like somebody who is committing some sort of crime by falling in love.

The persona in the song captures the aspect of unfair comparison by stating in stanza two: “Just because he did [leave a scar on your heart] / You swear I’m cheating / You think I just don’t care . . .” A line in the song that depicts the element of tiredness says in the chorus, “Always guilty before the sin / I can’t win, no I can’t win.”

Sure, one can’t score much when guilt defines every other thing one does. Determination to let bygones be bygones on the side of the guy is highlighted by posing in stanza two again, “Don’t let his wrongs to tear us apart / ’Cause girl I’m your man.” A more radical statement is made at the bridge of the song: “I know he did you wrong / But tell me what does that / Have to do with me?”

If you happen to be facing a similar situation to the persona’s, don’t hesitate to dedicate the song to her. Who knows, it might make her realise how overbearing she has been and that you are ready to part with her if she stops being haunted by the shadow of her errant ex. And that might iron things out.

The song is also a befitting dedication to that lady who is quick to rush into another man’s arms too soon after parting with her boyfriend. Psychologists advise that a break-up ought to be followed by a ‘holiday’ which one should spend picking up their pieces. If she goes too fast into another relationship, chances are high that the ex blues are still lingering upon her — and she will most definitely be doing an unhealthy comparison between the present and the past boyfie.